Do It Scared: Natalie's Challenge of Discovering What You’re Capable Of

For Natalie, pushing beyond her comfort zone has become about much more than running.

What began as a way to navigate grief and a difficult period in her life has evolved into a passion for endurance, adventure and deliberately doing the things that scare her.

From running 100K ultras and completing 9.2 laps of Helvellyn for the Apex Everest challenge, to tackling her fear of heights as part of her “Do It Scared” series, Natalie has repeatedly put herself in situations where stopping would be the easier option.

We caught up with Natalie for the latest Seashell Spirit feature to talk about how running changed her life, what she’s learned by repeatedly stepping outside her comfort zone, and why she’d rather face her fears than be left wondering “what if?”

You’ve run 100k Ultras and done 9.2 laps of Helvellyn for the Apex Everest - what is it about the challenges that most people would run away from that makes you want to run towards them?

I spent too much of my life in my comfort zone, afraid to try new things. When my dad passed away and I was also dealing with a relationship breakdown, my life felt completely turned upside down. I discovered running as an outlet for my grief, and from there it developed into a real passion and a drive to keep pushing myself.

My initial goal was simply to work up to running 10K non-stop. From there, things escalated somewhat! I surprised myself with what I was capable of and with every goal I achieved, I wanted to see what else I could do. I kept stretching myself and somewhere along the way I realised that endurance sport had taught me something that went far beyond running.

You can be exhausted, hurting, overwhelmed and wondering how you’re going to keep going, but somehow you find a way to take the next step. Sometimes you just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and trust that, eventually, things will feel a little lighter. Now, I’m driven by pushing myself beyond what I think is possible. I’m never satisfied with simply staying where I am. I feel like I owe it to the previous version of me to keep discovering what I’m truly capable of.

Honestly, if the version of me from five years ago and the version of me today could sit in a room together and have a chat, they wouldn’t believe they were the same person. I think that’s what keeps me running towards the challenges that most people would run away from. I’ve learned that the hardest miles, whether they’re physical or emotional, can teach you the most about yourself.

My biggest fear is heights, so doing the freefall “drop” off the suspended bridge at Honister Slate Mine was such an experience. I genuinely didn’t think I’d be able to do it.

I know I’ll probably never completely overcome my fear of heights, but I’ve shown myself that I can get comfortable with being uncomfortable. I was so proud of my little self that day. It would have been so much easier to say no, step back and stay in my comfort zone, but I don’t like “what ifs” anymore. For me, the only way to avoid regrets is to give things a go. I’d much rather be scared and do it anyway than look back and wonder what might have happened if I’d just been brave enough to try.

The Apex Everest challenge (9.2 laps of Helvellyn) is probably one of the most physically and mentally challenging things I’ve ever done. I love pushing myself physically, but when you’re being battered by relentless rain and storm-force gusts, it’s cold, it’s dark, and you’re exhausted, the little voices in your head start whispering at you to stop.

You start thinking, “If I stop now, I could be back having a nice warm shower.” And in those moments, that sounds very tempting! But I think that’s exactly when you have to remember why you started. We shouldn't quit just because things get tough, in fact that’s where resilience is built. In those moments when everything in you is telling you to stop, but you find a way to take one more step, then another.

I broke it down into small chunks and stopped thinking about how much was left. I just focused on the next lap, the next climb, the next step. Sometimes you don’t need to feel strong to keep going; you just need to keep moving forward. It's just one foot in front of the other. Those are the moments that remind me what I’m capable of.

I’ve learned that I’m capable of so much more than I ever thought I was. I used to have very little self-belief or confidence in myself and my default response to things was often, “I can’t” or simply “no” because that was easier.  Now, my mindset is completely different....“I’ll try, and if I fail, I’ll learn from it and try again.”

If you’re happy plodding along in life, then comfort zones are great. But if you want to grow or progress in any way, you have to push those boundaries and dip your toe outside that nice, cosy comfort blanket. No progress happens inside a comfort zone and I’m not prepared to stay there anymore. Every time I’ve pushed myself beyond what feels comfortable, I’ve discovered a little bit more about what I’m capable of. As a result, I’m not only stronger physically, but so much stronger mentally too. The biggest thing I’ve learned is that the limits I had put on myself were often just limits I’d imagined.

I’m going to keep these ones under wraps, so you’ll have to follow along and see what I get up to! What I will say is that I’m currently planning a big finale for July… and this one is SCARY! It will be my biggest challenge to date and is really going to test my nerves to the limit. I’m excited, terrified and already questioning what I’ve got myself into but I suppose that’s exactly the point of project “Do It Scared”! You’ll just have to wait and see…